Calling the cops on yourself is kinda stupid.

The weather has been great lately. It's been nice, cool and feeling like Halloween. My favorite holiday out of all of them. Yes, to me it is a holiday.

On nights like these I like to hang out by the door and enjoy the weather. You get to see the traffic, the people and occasionally something happens that could be funny or disturbing. On this night, the manager and I were both standing outside and noticed a group hanging out on the sidewalk talking, then they started walking towards us on the sidewalk and swinging around sign posts. As they got closer we could hear them talking.

"I can't believe they wouldn't let you back in that bar. Your not that drunk, I think that guy was just being a prick."

After hearing that Phil looked at me and told me not to let them in the bar. This is always a guaranteed way not to get into the bar your walking up to. Especially when I see you come from another bar that I know the guys there. Remember, I'm the doorman, I have the legal right to refuse you service or entry for any reason. This is one of the best reasons.

"Here ya go man."

"Sorry guys. You'll have to find another bar, there's a few others around here open late."

"What? We can't come in here? Why not?"

"We'll to start out, I heard you guys talking about how you weren't let back into the bar you were just at. Plus, my manager was out here and he heard you as well and said not to let you in."

"Bullshit man, I think your lying."

"That's nice. Have a good night guys, hope you find some fun somewhere else."

"No man, I wanna know why you won't let us in."

"I just told you. Have a good night."

After a few times back and forth the guy continues to stand there and then says, "I think you just want to fight man. Don't you? You just wanna hit me huh?"

"No, I don't get paid to fight. Have a good night."

Finally the girlfriend grabs the guy and starts to pull him away. "Come on, lets just take our money somewhere else. Fuck these guys, they don't deserve our money."

"Thank you. Have a great night."

She drags her guy away and I walk back inside. A few people came and went and about five minutes later the girl comes back and waves at me through the glass front door. So I walk over and see what she wants, expecting her to try and plead her way in.

"I thought I'd just let you know. We're calling the cops and telling them that theres underage drinking going on here."

"No prob, if you want to be a petty little bitch go for it. By the way, (insert big smile and hand waving goodbye here) kiss my ass."

I stood outside for a while after that to watch as the girls boyfriend jumps on his phone. Then after he hangs up they walk down the street and around the corner.

About five minutes later five police squad cars and a total of about ten or twelve cops are at my front door. So I walk outside to greet them. The sergeant walks up first and looks over to me. Then before he can say anything I simply say.

"Let me guess, you got a call about underage drinking."

"Why you say that?"

I then explain to him about the group and he asks for descriptions of the six people. Then he sends out four of the officers to look through the other bars for the people. Five cops go into my bar and look around.

"Actually, we got a call for a sixteen year old Hispanic inside the bar brandishing a firearm."

I gladly offer to walk through the other bars in the neighborhood with them to find the people but he says not to worry about it.

"Don't worry about it. We have their descriptions and they called 911 so we have their phone number. They'll be getting a visit sooner than they think."