Friday, June 29, 2007

Misconceptions of granduer...

"No, he's fine. He's with me."

"Listen hun, I'm trying to close down the bar. I can't have extra people sitting around in here."

"Well, he's with me then, that ok?"

"Well, if he's with you then I'm gonna have to ask you to leave too. Sorry."

"What!? I always stick around!"

Some people get to stick around after hours. Yea, they're not supposed to technically but there are always little rules that get bent. Usually it's boyfriends, girlfriends, roommates or some kind of good friend. Some times it's people who work in the industry at a different bar or restaurant. Most of these people know the rules. You don't cause problems. You don't get loud. You just hang out while it's quiet, talk with friends and enjoy a drink or two.

It's never people who aren't good friends of an employee or the bar.

"I don't know who this guy is. He can leave."

"Are you serious? He's a friend of mine."

"And who's his friend that works here? I don't know him so he has to go. Plain and simple."

"Then how come I always get to stay?"

"Your fuckin Casper aren't ya?"

The expression on her face was worth it. Not only did I bust her out in front of some guy but she actually didn't know that everyone there knew about her and Casper.

"Wha.. what did you say?"

"Listen, everyone that hangs out, hangs out for a reason. It's not a right. Boyfriends wait for girlfriends and hook ups wait for hook ups. Not friends of hook ups. They don't count."

Then the guy decided to pipe in. "Hey man, I can pay for my drinks."

"Hey man, you want to do me a favor? Just leave. There's no paying for drinks now, the bar's closed. Bye."

So the guy shrugs his shoulders and tells the girl that he's taking off. A few minutes later her phone rings. She talks a little bit, hangs up, says her good byes to everyone and leaves. I step outside to make sure she gets into a cab and see Casper pull up. He steps out of his car and motions her over. She starts walking across the street and Casper gives me a thumbs up. I guess I made a point that he wanted her to know.

Casper's a dick but he did say one thing once that made sense. If you have something they want they'll never leave you. I guess being able to hang out late night at a bar is enough for some.

Sad to think that's all it takes for some people.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Let's get dinner some time....

There are a few things that bother me. Most of them separate between work and life.

I'm not the guy that typically works in a bar or a nightclub in a security position. I don't take a liking to my job due to the power that comes with it. Power means nothing to me. Why? Because away from work I'm no one just like you. I take comfort in knowing that. I know that once I step away from which ever establishment I'm working at I'm just another person riding a bus, walking down the street or driving down the road. I'm no one special when away from work. While I'm at work I'm the one person everyone wants to know.

I get a lot of "We should hang out" or "Let's get dinner some time". I get it so often that when I hear it now I usually just brush it off as someone else trying to get nice with the bouncer. They think that false guarantees will get them in faster, free drinks or they'll be upgraded so they can skip the line. It doesn't work like that.

I'll tell you now, the fastest way to be remembered by a bouncer or doorman is cash. Good ole green paper money. Now I'm not talking about being cheap here either. Depending on the number of people that are with you will depend on how much you will need to be remembered. On a typical scale the best way to be remembered is about $20 a head. But... if the club has a cover charge for the night then the typical scale would be twice the amount of the cover per person.

Now depending on the club it's all different. Your best bet would be to actually show up early and talk with the door staff. Show up on a slow night and talk to the guy at the door. Chances are he's the same guy that's there on the weekends to but bring that up in conversation. If the guy acts like he doesn't want to hear a word your saying then he probably doesn't and your shit out of luck.

I hate to admit this part. I really do because at some clubs it works like a charm but it only works for the ladies. Ladies... show off what was given to you. Either it was given to you at creation or you've bought it but it does work at a lot of clubs.

Clubs want hot ladies there. It's a proven fact that if there are women there, men will show up and spend even more money. I've even let groups of women skip the line just so the guys see what is in store. Of course, I'm more the type that only wants to see it if I can have it. And I rarely see anything I want by the end of the night.

Sorry hun, your wasted, I'm sober.

So now that I've gone off on a tangent...

I really don't want to hear about how we should hang out or we should go out some time. I really don't. I hear it a lot and I've followed up on a few of them. It usually ends up with responses such as how busy they were at work and how tired they are and don't want to go out. That's fine. I hate to say it but I remember that crap when you show up to the club again. It's when I get to say how tired I am and I don't want to open the door for you so you'll have to wait in line.

Hey, turn around is fair play. It might seem petty but remember.. You offered something up to the table worth far more than I ever did. I offered the pass to get into a bar. You offered up "dinner" as you pressed your big ass chest against me and your hand came up missing.

This isn't a one ride bull. Put your money where your mouth is.