When I say young'en I mean someone at least 7 years or more younger than myself. An age bracket that I know not to mess with because it's a totally different age. It's the age of drinking and partying and just going out every night. I'm past that stage in my life. I'm out almost every night of the week as it is and I'm babysitting all these kids.
Of course sometimes I get wrapped up in certain ones. I'll admit it, I'm human and worse yet, I'm male. When a little woman comes up to me at work and talks I rarely listen. Unless that talking is being turned into a different direction.
The bad part is, I'm a sucker. When talk gets turned towards the bedroom I rarely even listen. The times I do is when it's early in the night or the person is sober. I tend to ignore when the woman is drunk in any way.
I'm also pretty straight forward about situations. If it's something that might go somewhere I just let things fall and see where they land. If it's something I don't see becoming anything other than a hook up then I make it clear. I've even told girls, "I don't want you to think this is going to became a relationship. I don't want that now." Which basically means with that person. Sex is sex, not much more. I don't want them to get false hopes of a boyfriend.
So the part that annoys me is the ones that are ok with just being "buddies" and then a few weeks later they want more. I guess it's just typical that after a short term of such intimate exposure someone would want more.
That brings on other things. Text messages in the middle of the night. Phone calls in the middle of the day. Occasional appearances at my work. It gets annoying.
For instance. I met this girl. She's all of 23 or 24 years old. She expressed interest in me, we talked and one thing led to another. We hooked up a couple of times and I expressed to her that I didn't want a girlfriend but if she just wanted to hook up that'd be fine with me. No relationship, no ties, just plain old sex upon contact. She's too young mentally for me to take seriously. She also drinks on a daily basis and is a big pot head.
One night at work she showed up. I was standing at the door and she walked in. "Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?"
"Sure, what you need?"
"Well, I wanted to talk about us."
"Us? What about us?"
"Well, I'd like there to be more... us."
"So you want to get together more?"
"Well.. I was thinking we could go to dinner and maybe go to a movie or something."
"Why would we do that?"
"Well... that's what couples do."
"Haha... ok, listen.. We're not a couple. Remember I told you I didn't want anything more than a hook up? I'm not interested in a girlfriend or anything like that."
"Yea... I know.. I was just thinking that things might have changed... I mean, I started to like you a lot and I thought we could do some things..."
"Well... no. We can't. I don't have any of those feelings. We all done now? I'm kinda at work and don't need to be distracted with this."
She ended up leaving after that. I don't blame her, I did the asshole thing and basically told her I didn't want anything to do with her. Just like I did when we first got together. Strange thing how some guys say things and mean what they actually say. Too many women go with it in hopes that they'll change our minds down the road.
A couple nights later the text messages start.
I might stop by to see you.
Maybe we can talk?
I'm at work. Not a place to talk.
It's ok. I just want to hang out, not have sex.
I have nothing to talk about.
Of course she didn't show up. I turned off the channel of communication because I literally had nothing to talk about. I'm not going to say we can talk and give her hopes that we will. I'm also not going to give her the hopes and then try to just get laid. I'm not that type.
Plain and simple it's the easiest way to be. Ladies, if a guy tells you he just wants to hook up occasionally then believe, that all he wants, is to hook up occasionally. He's not secretly hoping that it could turn into a marriage or even a relationship. Remember this, even if it lasts for 6 months or more. He likes what's going on and how it's going on. If you have a change of heart tell him.
I've only known of a few rare instances where it actually worked out differently.