Bounty Girls...

Ok, so the other night I was watching tv and I happened upon Court TV. They had a new show on called Bounty Girls Miami. I figured I'd give it a chance because the commercials I'd seen of it made it look interesting. Why not? There are 4 attractive women that go after people who have skipped out on their bail bonds. Basically the new breed of bounty hunters.

I'll be the first to admit that what caught my eye was that they're attractive females. I won't hide that at all. Also that they are attractive females that look like they can dish out some pain. Well, it looked like that in the commercial. Turns out they were in a class or training or something.

There seems to be a recurring theme here...

So I sat through an hour and a half of two 2 hour episodes. Ok... Where should I start...

Things about the show that I just don't like.

1. It has way too much of an "acting" feel to it. All the scenes in the office seem to be acted and not live.
2. The girls are way too obsessed with make up and their looks. Perfect example: en route to do surveillance one of the girls is driving down the highway at high speeds while putting on eye liner and no seat belt. The passenger even complains to her on screen about it. Her response, "What? I'm a multi-tasker."
   
3. Everything is harder and more dangerous for a woman. I think they said that at least 40 times in the first hour. Look at the profession you decided to enter. Don't complain constantly about how dangerous it is for you because your a woman.
4. The camera crew is constantly being seen in the shots. Either their running out of the office when the cars pull up or they're in the back seats of the cars when they're out on jobs.
5. Certain scenes suggest there is "back up".
   

More things...

The main "boss" character is Jag. She kinda lives up to her name. She's a very strong person and it comes out in her speech and attitude. She seems to be very controlling even with her 20 year old daughter who is a receptionist at the office. She's 20... let her make her own stupid decisions. I understand it's your kid but how else do they learn? Jag constantly complains about the other girls and how she would have done it right the first time. Then just do it.

The other girls are pretty quiet. They sit and listen to Jag's complaints and bicker.

I sat through the first episode thinking that I'd give it a shot and see where it goes. The show didn't do much for me really. The attractive part was good but it's not enough to carry the show. I was hoping for more in the action department or even for the drama level to be taken up a notch but it never happened. Even when they went to attain their first perp it seemed over acted. The guy stopped, turned and put his hands against the wall and Jag almost knocked him over trying to jump and put handcuffs on him.

I started to watch the second episode but lost interest.

One thing I did find a little funny. At the beginning of the second episode Jade was sitting at the table while they talked about their new assignment. Her shirt said "taking applications". I wonder how many fan mails she'll get with resumes. Too bad I hate Florida.

Anyways, this is all just what I thought. If you want to know what more people thought about it check it out on the shows message board.

Bounty Girls Miami Message Board on Court TV.com

The show is worth checking out. Based on the first episode I don't think I'll make it part of my routine.

Hate to say it but it could use a little testosterone.

Processing of numbers...

It's very rare these days that I entertain the idea of actually going out on a date. I've become very cynical about the concept of dating. There are too many different forms of dating and there doesn't seem to be many people left with the same ideas of it as I have. I guess I'm the old school version compared to the new action packed city version.

I'm not the type of person to date more than one person at a time. It's just confusing and extremely embarrassing if you say the wrong name to the wrong person. It's easier to keep things on a one to one standard. That's not the only thing that's better to have as a one to one standard. I'm not the type to sleep around with more than one lady at a time either. It's just safe practice. Then again, if all women were ladies...

Yea... I'm a doorman, a "bouncer", and I work in bars. Doesn't mean I'm completely stupid, want to fight all the time or need to have sex all the time. Granted.. if I could, I would. Just not with everyone in the neighborhood.

There are certain types or ladies that catch my eye. Like most types of people they usually stick to their neighborhoods or the places that tend to lean to their preference in music and lifestyle. All the different places I work or have worked have never been the type of places that have attracted the type of ladies that I'm more attracted to. Which I guess could be a good thing.

So occasionally a lady will be out of her environment and she'll stumble her way into one of the places I work. I always take notice and still I won't go out of my way to make an impression. I just stand there, check her i.d. and welcome her to the establishment. I'll make a little talk and try to get a smile from her, which works about 80% of the time. After that it's out of my hands. I don't pester her, I don't have drinks taken to her table and I don't keep an eye on her. I just go back to standing at my post and doing what I get paid to do. On a couple of occasions I've had a lady come back up to me and she'll open up a conversation. By the end of the conversation she knows things she wanted to know and sometimes even more. At the end of the night she leaves usually saying that she'll see me soon. Rarely do I see them again.

If they do come back I welcome them to the bar, check their i.d. and act surprised that they are back. I usually do this by bringing up some kind of quirk that we talked about. We talk a little bit and she goes into the bar. When I make it inside she comes up and we talk and I either notice what she's drinking or I ask her. Then later when it looks like she might be getting bored at her table or she might be leaving I ask the waitress to go over and ask her if she wants a drink and that the doorman is buying. Sweet guy, right?

A couple hours later it's last call. She's still hanging out and we've talked a couple times. The lights have come up and it's time for everyone to leave. She walks up and grabs my arm, "How late do you have to be here?"

"Well, I have to get everyone out of here and then clean up a little. Maybe an hour or so until I can take off."

"Oh.. can't someone else do that for you? I really want to hang out with you tonight."

"Well, they could but I'd rather they didn't. How bout we switch numbers and we can hang out tomorrow sometime during the day."

"I'm busy tomorrow but I do want your number. I really want to hang out with you."

She's not comfortable giving me her number so I just give her mine. Then she gives me a little peck on the cheek and she heads out.

I don't hear from her until this night happens.

Typical. People wonder why I get cynical about women.

Dogs get to chew on Vick...

I'm sure by now everyone has heard about the dog fighting circuit that Michael Vick was a part of. I'm sorry, the verdict isn't in yet... the dog fighting circuit that Michael Vick is suspected of funding, providing training grounds for, and being a part of.

If your not familiar with this then google Michael Vick and read up on it. Here are a few links in any case.

Dear Vick, Stay Home, Commish.

Vick indicted by grand jury in dogfighting probe

Michael Vick Dogfighting Case Makes Way to Floor of U.S. Senate

So I made this clear before in a different post. I think people who aim for breed specific legislation are idiots. I think people who condone dog fighting are a couple steps from being serial killers. It's the type of mentality that would go that far. They don't think anything about it but they love the feeling they get when they watch dogs bite into each other and tear flesh away from each other.

These people should be put into a pit with some of these animals. Their arms and legs tied together and left there to survive. Then if they do happen to survive treat them the same way they've treated the numerous animals found that lost their matches. String them up from a tree, electrocute them or just shoot them in the head.

These people are useless.

Right now though, if you have a dog and you wish Michael Vick could get a nice big bite from your pup. Hurry and order this Michael Vick chew toy. I saw it and started smiling. I ordered a couple for my pups.

You might want to hurry though, I'm sure once his lawyers find out about it they'll get shut down. I'm even putting a link to it on the right side of the page for easy finding.

Get yours while you can.

Busy, Busy...

Now that the heat is starting to turn up more and summer is in effect we've been getting busier. Thursdays have became the new Friday and Friday and Saturday are still just as busy as always. Plus, with all the little festivals going on in the neighborhood it gets people out of their house earlier and they want to stay out later. Which means even more people trying to get into the establishment.

What's this mean for me?

It means that I deal with more people that just don't seem to have a clue. It means more people waiting in line to get in and even more people arguing with me as to why they aren't coming in. The wait time is longer because less people are leaving. Even more people are trying to play the "I work at this place or that place" game and more regulars to deal with.

The entire neighborhood has changed a lot. There's more of the baby stroller yuppie types in the neighborhood now and a lot more suburban people coming through which means less stories about people trying to tip me to get in. Now it's usually "Stop by my job and I'll hook you up with free entries with your dinner," or "I'll hook you up with free tickets to a show." The sad part is that I already have these hook ups through these peoples bosses. So now your offers are null and void.

I wish I could revisit posts of people hooking me up like Mr Strong Handshake did back in the day. If I had more days like that I wouldn't be so stressed about everyone being clueless about how things work. I guess I've been in the industry too long to realize that not everyone thinks of these things as common sense practices.

The major festivals bring about bands and promoters and I'm always trying to hook them up. I don't ask for anything from them but if I have heard of them I will do what I can. If I don't know you then I hope that you show up with someone I know from the club you played at. Then I can make them look like rock stars. Occasionally I'll get tickets to a fairly big show in the area for helping them out.

When I get the tickets it's a toss up as to what I actually use them for. Sometimes I'll give them to some unknowing customers that were really cool or I'll give them to a co-worker, very rarely I'll sell them. If I do it's money in my pocket and everyones happy, especially me. I've even used them as trade before to get things that I really wanted for myself. Flat panel TVs and other items are pretty expensive these days.

So every hook up is used for a hook up. That's how it's done. A person doesn't go out of their way for you just because they think your nice if they don't know you. They do it so they can get something out of it for themselves. Yes, that even goes for that nice guy that held the door open for the girl. Everyone wants something.

I know.. I'm being cynical again. Or am I?

Lost or Found...

It's inevitable. Some day you'll forget something at a bar. Hopefully you forget it and someone didn't just steal it. Your best action is to call the bar the next day and see if they have a lost and found.

Every night I walk the establishment and see if anything is left behind. I watch the floor for dropped money and I look around to see if anyone left behind bags, cell phones, clothing or anything that catches my eye. I do have to admit, any money I find I keep. It's usually only 5 or 10 bucks but if it's on the floor and not inside anything it's fair game.

Occasionally I'll find a briefcase or satchel and I look through it to see if there's any type of identification in it. That way if there's a way to contact the person the management will contact them. If there isn't a way to contact them the bag goes into the lost and found. If the person doesn't come back for it in a couple weeks then who ever finds it gets first dibs on it.

One night as I was walking the area I found a satchel that had a laptop, ipod, 6 or 8 manilla folders, and numerous other things. One of the things inside was a little leather book that had $700 in it. All together, I'd say there was $1,500 worth of items inside this bag. I took it down to the office and signed it in to the management. Then I went back to finishing the night.

About a half hour later there's a knock at the door. So I walk over to see who it is at the door and find a gentleman in his 40's standing there with a cab waiting for him. I unlock the door and slightly push it open. "Bar's closed. Can I help you?"

"Yea mate, I was here earlier and I think I left my bag here."

"Can you tell me what it looks like and the contents?"

"Yea, yea.. It was a black satchel with grey on it and I had my laptop, an ipod, and a bunch of paperwork in it. My passport should be in there too."

"Ok, give me a second and I'll take a look. Be right back." I locked the door and headed back to the office to get the bag I just put there. I walked back up to the door and held up the bag. The man smiled big and gave me a thumbs up. I unlocked the door and handed it to him.

"Oh man, thank you mate!! This thing has my whole life in it. I'm here from Australia and I'm giving a proposal to get my company work here. If not for you I'd be literally screwed! Thanks so much!!"

I stood there looking at him. Listened to everything he had just said. I saved him from a lot of problems. Might have helped make him a millionaire or some shit. Then he says this. "I wish I could give you a reward or something for saving me."

Then he got in the cab and left.

Ok... I'm not the type to be looking for rewards because I found your stuff in the bar. I find things in the bar almost daily. If I saved you and your business from what ever I saved you from and you have $700 sitting in there (that I could have taken) then how bout a monetary reward? I'm not saying $200 or $300 but $50 would have made my night.

People don't seem to understand. When people find things in bars 70% of the time the ones that lost it don't come back for it. They don't remember where they lost it or where they had been that night. So after a couple weeks most of these things go home with who ever found it.

The other part that people don't understand is this. When things are found at a bar, who's to say that what's in them is found in them. What's stopping that person from pocketing that $700 that was in there? Hey, we found it on the floor in a bar after 400 or 500 people were in here. Maybe someone else took it cause it wasn't there when I found the bag. Or who's to say we ever even found the bag.

So remember, if you lose something in a bar and you go back and all your things are still there, then someone honest kept that for you. They're not expecting you to give them a reward. They're not expecting you to go out of your way for them. They will second guess themselves the next time they hear someone go on about how they saved someone's life by holding onto something. Maybe next time they just won't find the bag or turn it in.

So if someone does something really good for you without asking then remember to pay it back in some way. What works well a lot of the time is just an offering. The next time you go there offer to get them a drink, or food, or even throw them $20 or more for holding the bag.

That whole pay it forward thing is bullshit. If you don't do it naturally then you won't pay it forward. Pay it back to the one that helped you.

Rattling Tongues...

There's a lot of times when I'm at work and people come up complaining about the guy that works on my nights off.

"He wouldn't let me in cause he said I was wasted." You were wasted.

"He asked me to leave and I wasn't doing a thing." You dropped 3 bottles of beer and they all broke in the matter of half an hour.

"Man, he was being a dick so we left." He was being a dick cause he wouldn't give your friend his fake i.d. back? Aww, too bad.

There's always something every week. He did this or he did that. Honestly, I don't care. I'm not at work. If anything, this is a sign that he's doing the job he was hired for. I do keep in touch with him. I like to know what goes on when I'm not there so I know what to look out for on the days I do work.

Sometimes he has to deal with situations. Sometimes those situations come back through out the week. Then we both get to deal with it again. It's a lot more calm now than it used to be. These days it's just people trying to stroke the egos so they get remembered on a busy night. Your better than that guy is or vice versa.


To me it's all noise. I know who's cool with me. I should, after all, I am me.

Time and Place...

As the saying goes... "There's a time and place for everything." It's basically the same as saying, "Know when to pick your battles." There's not always a perfect time to pick an argument with someone, especially when it's on a personal level, but there is always a better place.

A lot of this depends on the type of person you are too. If your the type of person that has to make a big deal out of nothing then you don't think about this. You want to cause a scene where ever you are just so people can notice you. You want people to think you are being put down or held back. You want the attention to be towards you even if it's bad. "All publicity, whether good or bad is still publicity."

These people are the type of people that will constantly keep the drama going just so they can be in the middle of conversations as long as they can. They love the drama, they love the attention and if they don't have it they might have to be real.

So when one of these people makes an employee feel uncomfortable or the employee just doesn't want them at the establishment then we don't let them in. It's a pretty standard way of doing things. If your uncomfortable with someone then that person doesn't come in. It doesn't matter if your a guy or girl all you have to be is an employee or a good friend of an employee. If there's a possibility of fireworks going off then we make sure it doesn't happen.

The only time it's different is if it happens to be a significant other.

Then the policy changes a little. Then the policy is still basic, the person that isn't wanted there doesn't come in when the person that is involved with the conflict is working. Pretty basic yet to the people that are over dramatic it's too much for them to handle. They still walk up, they still try to come in the bar. Listen, keep acting like an asshole and you'll get banned even if your significant other works there.

Now when you have an altercation with a doorman that works at the same place your girl does don't get in his face at his job. That's like giving candy to a baby. It's our job to keep idiots out. If your picking a fight with us at the door we're not going to let you in. At this point we don't care who you know inside. Personally, I don't care if your the owner because I've kicked you out of the bar before and the next day you called me to apologize.

So if you don't want the drama to continue like you've said then apologize and act civil. Shit, you don't even have to apologize just act civil while your there. Don't mumble under your breath, don't roll your eyes, don't look at me all disgruntled. Go in, have a few drinks and see if that builds up your courage. Then if you feel like getting all riled up we'll see what happens. You'll be wasted, the doorman will be sober and someone will look like an idiot.

I hate saying this like this but, "Take yo drama to yo momma. Leave that shit at home."

This isn't the beach...

I understand that people are different. I understand that people dress different. I don't understand why people wear flip flops to a late night bar. This isn't the beach, it isn't the community pool or shower and it sure as hell isn't the beach.

Flip flops are basically useless footwear. They are standard issue footwear for the douche bag guys that come in a lot.

There's only a few places that flip flops are considered to be alright to be worn.

• The Beach
• Community Pools and Showers (i.e., YMCA, Local Gyms, Shower Rooms, etc.)
• Sitting around at home.
• Taking the dog for a walk.

I'm sure there's a few other times involved that I don't even care about.

Here's my point. Don't go to a late night bar with flip flops on. It's late, there's drunks out, glasses and bottles will get broken, and people will step on your feet.

It's common sense.

I've given regulars shit for it on numerous occasions. They'll stop by on their way home and I'll look at their feet and kind of laugh when I see the flip flops. They explain how they were at the beach and I end the conversation with, "Not my fault if you cut your foot open. Have fun."

I wear steel toe boots at work. Why? Because I've always had to have steel toe boots for previous jobs and they're what I'm comfortable wearing. Six or eight people step on my feet on a busy night, with the steel toes I don't feel it. Plus you never know what else they might be good for. The soles and heels are thick so not much is going to go through them; especially not glass from a bottle. They also give great ankle support in case I need to run down some one skipping out on their bill.

Anyways, I really don't want to have to call an ambulance because you come into the bar and step on glass or your toe gets cut open from it being exposed.

So how bout we leave the flip flops and sandals at home.

Late Night Call...

No matter what happens, it's not usually a good idea to call someone at home because you can't get into a bar. There's usually a really good reason why you can't get into the bar, especially if I can hear it in your voice over the phone.

"Hey Mike... thiz guy won led me in dhe bar... can you tell im thad I'm ok?"

"What?"

"Dis guy here.. he won led me in dhe bar... tell im thad I'm ok..."

"I tell you what, put him on the phone."

"Hey Mike, listen..."

"Hey man, sorry to interrupt but just nod your head like I'm talking and then give her the phone back and don't let her in. She really as fucked up as she sounds?"

"Oh yea."

"Cool, I'll see ya in a day or two."

There has to be better reasons for calling me at 12:30 am. At least I'd like to think so. How did this chic even get my number is what I'd like to know. There's plenty of other reasons to be calling me at that time of night. Granted, I'm still awake but that's not the call I want to get.

If it's that important that you get into the bar then you need to re-evaluate your priorities sweet heart.

Hilton-esque

So all the media hype about the poor little rich girl is unnerving. Is this what is really the most important thing going on these days? The fact that some little bimbo got caught driving under the influence, then not even a year later while on probation she gets ticketed for going 70 in a 35 while on probation is ridiculous.

To think that this is the type of role model that too many kids are looking up to is disturbing. A little bitch of a girl is helping to form the next generation.

I remember when a kid messed up and the father took action with his own hand or a belt. It's that type of parenting that has become wrong to the many people who think it's hurting the children. Yea, it hurts but guess what. The kid isn't going to do it again. Now I'm not saying that beating your kid is the right thing to do. It's not. There is a difference between beating your kid and reprimanding them.

The one thing that did catch my eye is how her mother and father didn't go busting in and try to save the day. For that I give them kudos. Her mother sat in court and watched as it all happened. Her father was probably sitting at home shaking his head in disapproval. Although I can't say that for certain.

All in all I don't see what the big to do is over this near anorexic girl is. She's just another one of those bimbos that causes a big scandal and wants the world to feel sorry for her because she's richer than everyone else and thinks her shit doesn't stink.

Guess what. Thanks to the Honorable Judge Michael T. Sauer, her shit stinks just like all the other people who mess up to that degree.

I also think it's great how all the petitions that were sent to Governor Schwarzenegger all fell straight on their faces. He did the right thing by not trying to separate the celebrities from the common people.

If you want to know all the run downs then I suggest going to the Wikipedia page where they have a lot of information for all to read.

The page can be found here:

Paris Hilton on Wikipedia

My favorite part is how she tells Larry King in her interview that she has never done drugs and isn't fond of alcohol either.

Ok, she must really think the entire world is stupid.

http://www.courttv.com/tsg/parisking2.swf

http://www.courttv.com/tsg/parisking7.swf

Homeland...

Like any other person that lives in a bigger city and likes to afford living and not just inhabiting; I have a roommate.

It's not a bad thing entirely. Rent's cheap, bills are cheap and sometimes food is pretty cheap too. The only downfall with the current roommate isn't really that bad of a thing either. Well, it hasn't been yet. Let me explain.

Work is work. I don't bring work home with me and I like that. My friends know where I live and they stop by rarely. We see each other enough at work. It's a separation thing, kind of like church and state.

I don't bring home drunken women because I don't want them coming back half the time. I don't bring people back to my home to party after hours because I like having the things I have. I've always been a type of person that you can do a lot or say a lot to me and I won't really react in a angry manner. There is one thing that will set me off faster than everything else. Steal from me and you'll see fire rain down from the sky.

I own some nice things. They might not be nice to you but they are to me. I paid money for them and I like them where they are and how they are. This is the main reason I don't bring a lot of people back to the house. That and out of respect to my roommate since she usually has to be up early for what ever she's doing.

Now she doesn't bring home a lot of people. In fact, most of the people she brings over are pretty decent. As with everything there are exceptions.

I came home early one night and walk into the apartment. I hear the tv on so I peek my head into the living room. The roommate, Sheila, is sitting on the couch with a guy. I step in to say hello and get a look at the guy. He says hey and I turn and walk out of the room.

Out of respect to Sheila I don't automatically grab this guy and toss him out the window.

So I go back to my room and sit here at the window of enlightenment. After a while I hear the door open and close so I step out to see who left or came in. Sheila's standing there and the guy had left.

"Who's that guy?"

"Oh Charlie? He's a good guy, I've known him for a little while now."

"Well Charlie's lucky I didn't break a boot off in his ass about a week ago."

"Really? He's always been really cool with me."

"I had to toss him out of the bar. He was a little jack ass."

"Yea, he gets that way some times I'm told."

"Not around me again I hope."

Misconceptions of granduer...

"No, he's fine. He's with me."

"Listen hun, I'm trying to close down the bar. I can't have extra people sitting around in here."

"Well, he's with me then, that ok?"

"Well, if he's with you then I'm gonna have to ask you to leave too. Sorry."

"What!? I always stick around!"

Some people get to stick around after hours. Yea, they're not supposed to technically but there are always little rules that get bent. Usually it's boyfriends, girlfriends, roommates or some kind of good friend. Some times it's people who work in the industry at a different bar or restaurant. Most of these people know the rules. You don't cause problems. You don't get loud. You just hang out while it's quiet, talk with friends and enjoy a drink or two.

It's never people who aren't good friends of an employee or the bar.

"I don't know who this guy is. He can leave."

"Are you serious? He's a friend of mine."

"And who's his friend that works here? I don't know him so he has to go. Plain and simple."

"Then how come I always get to stay?"

"Your fuckin Casper aren't ya?"

The expression on her face was worth it. Not only did I bust her out in front of some guy but she actually didn't know that everyone there knew about her and Casper.

"Wha.. what did you say?"

"Listen, everyone that hangs out, hangs out for a reason. It's not a right. Boyfriends wait for girlfriends and hook ups wait for hook ups. Not friends of hook ups. They don't count."

Then the guy decided to pipe in. "Hey man, I can pay for my drinks."

"Hey man, you want to do me a favor? Just leave. There's no paying for drinks now, the bar's closed. Bye."

So the guy shrugs his shoulders and tells the girl that he's taking off. A few minutes later her phone rings. She talks a little bit, hangs up, says her good byes to everyone and leaves. I step outside to make sure she gets into a cab and see Casper pull up. He steps out of his car and motions her over. She starts walking across the street and Casper gives me a thumbs up. I guess I made a point that he wanted her to know.

Casper's a dick but he did say one thing once that made sense. If you have something they want they'll never leave you. I guess being able to hang out late night at a bar is enough for some.

Sad to think that's all it takes for some people.

Let's get dinner some time....

There are a few things that bother me. Most of them separate between work and life.

I'm not the guy that typically works in a bar or a nightclub in a security position. I don't take a liking to my job due to the power that comes with it. Power means nothing to me. Why? Because away from work I'm no one just like you. I take comfort in knowing that. I know that once I step away from which ever establishment I'm working at I'm just another person riding a bus, walking down the street or driving down the road. I'm no one special when away from work. While I'm at work I'm the one person everyone wants to know.

I get a lot of "We should hang out" or "Let's get dinner some time". I get it so often that when I hear it now I usually just brush it off as someone else trying to get nice with the bouncer. They think that false guarantees will get them in faster, free drinks or they'll be upgraded so they can skip the line. It doesn't work like that.

I'll tell you now, the fastest way to be remembered by a bouncer or doorman is cash. Good ole green paper money. Now I'm not talking about being cheap here either. Depending on the number of people that are with you will depend on how much you will need to be remembered. On a typical scale the best way to be remembered is about $20 a head. But... if the club has a cover charge for the night then the typical scale would be twice the amount of the cover per person.

Now depending on the club it's all different. Your best bet would be to actually show up early and talk with the door staff. Show up on a slow night and talk to the guy at the door. Chances are he's the same guy that's there on the weekends to but bring that up in conversation. If the guy acts like he doesn't want to hear a word your saying then he probably doesn't and your shit out of luck.

I hate to admit this part. I really do because at some clubs it works like a charm but it only works for the ladies. Ladies... show off what was given to you. Either it was given to you at creation or you've bought it but it does work at a lot of clubs.

Clubs want hot ladies there. It's a proven fact that if there are women there, men will show up and spend even more money. I've even let groups of women skip the line just so the guys see what is in store. Of course, I'm more the type that only wants to see it if I can have it. And I rarely see anything I want by the end of the night.

Sorry hun, your wasted, I'm sober.

So now that I've gone off on a tangent...

I really don't want to hear about how we should hang out or we should go out some time. I really don't. I hear it a lot and I've followed up on a few of them. It usually ends up with responses such as how busy they were at work and how tired they are and don't want to go out. That's fine. I hate to say it but I remember that crap when you show up to the club again. It's when I get to say how tired I am and I don't want to open the door for you so you'll have to wait in line.

Hey, turn around is fair play. It might seem petty but remember.. You offered something up to the table worth far more than I ever did. I offered the pass to get into a bar. You offered up "dinner" as you pressed your big ass chest against me and your hand came up missing.


This isn't a one ride bull. Put your money where your mouth is.

Litter Bug...

Ultimately there's always someone that walks up to the bar with food. It's just a normal thing that people do. They drink, get hungry and grab some food from one of the street vendors as they go on to the next bar. Some do it because they're hungry and some think it will sober them up so they can stay out longer and drink more. For some reason they think, if they eat, it will soak up that belly full of booze and make room for more.

So, one night a couple of guys come walking up to the front of the bar. They were the typical type of douche bags. The type of guys that either are still in college or are trying to hold on to those glamourous years of high fiving and chasing women with their abilities of spending their parents money. I think I even have a visual for this one...

I thought I did...

So when these two guys come walking up they both have food. No big deal really, I explain to them that they have to finish their food before coming in and they both nod their heads in agreement. Then they start shoving the food into their mouths and the paper plates, napkins and other things they have all fall to the sidewalk. In typical douche bag fashion they let out a little yell, give each other a high five and start to dig their wallets out to give me their ID's.

Now, I'm not going to say that this town is a clean town, everyone knows that it isn't. There's garbage all over the place and there are people that get paid to clean up after all the inconsiderate slobs. From what I understand they make really good money too. Well, they either make good money or they're doing it as a community service because they did something stupid before.

As DB#1 goes to hand me his ID, I look down at the sidewalk.

Me: "You guys gonna leave that garbage there?"

DB#1: "Uh, yea bro. We're here to drink!"

Me: "Ok.. I need you to pick up that garbage first though."

DB#1: "It's cool dude. Someone gets paid to do that. They'll get it in the morning." He then laughs and looks at his friend.

Me: "Yea, it's not cool. If you guys want to come in then you need to pick up your garbage. It's not about people being paid to clean up after you. It's a respect type thing. You leave your garbage here and it's not showing much respect for me, the bar, or many other things."

DB#1: "Dude, why you gotta be an asshole?"

Me: "Really? I'm being an asshole because I'm asking you to respect something else instead of your hair gel and your parents credit card?"

As DB#1 and I are starting our conversation I could see that DB#2 was listening very closely. In fact, he even started picking up the garbage as his counterpart kept arguing with me.

DB#2: "Alright man, is there a garbage can near by?"

Me: "There's one right around the corner. Thanks."

DB#1: "You actually picked that shit up? HA HA HA!!"

DB#2: "Yea... he's kinda right and he won't let us in if we don't."

So after I the guy picks up the garbage and tosses it I check their ID's. I tell them thank you for picking it up and they start walking in. As they walk in I walk in behind them just to take a look and see how things are inside.

DB#1 (turning to DB#2): "Man, that guys a fuckin asshole huh?"

I tap the guy on the shoulder. "Excuse me?"

DB#1: "What man? You got a problem?"

Me: "I do now. Come on, it's time to go."

DB#2 (looking at his friend): "Dude, what the fuck? You can't keep your mouth shut for a second?"

They walk out without a problem and head down the street arguing with each other like a married couple. I could hear them arguing until they rounded the corner a block away.

I don't ask for much. I ask for respect. For me, the establishment, and the people around you. At one time this was a common idea among all people. As time goes by people tend to forget the lessons that were learned by our elders. Is it the elders fault for the younger generation ignoring them or is it the fault of the peers that just let things go because that's just how their friends are?

You can choose your friends, you can't choose your family.

Days off with a Concert in there...

Finally been able to take a few days off from work here and there. I think I really needed it. With any job you always tend to hit that point where you need some time off. I don't think it was due to the stress levels just the fact that standing in a spot for 7 to 8 hours a night and for 5 to 7 nights a week tends to wear on you.

So I went to a concert on one of my nights off. I rarely ever go to shows anymore. After you've worked in a venue long enough it kind of loses its flair. So I go to 2 or 3 shows a year where I really want to see the band.

The second band that played tried to be more of the political awareness types of bands. This one just tries to push their own ideals. If your going to try and change the world then put the facts out there that you know. Don't just tell all these people what they should do. Also, remember, over 50% of the people at your show are under 18 years of age. They're there for the music and the experience, not to listen to you talk and talk between songs. Plus, they're signatures and opinions aren't worth anything constructive. I almost got up and left.

There are some bands out there that do it right. They talk a little but get straight to the point. They have media slide shows going during their set. Best of all, they provide information so you can make your own decision. They don't try to pressure you into something by saying you only like us if you do this. The best example of a band I can think of that does it right is System of a Down. The band I saw, I won't even mention their name.

So having a few days off has been some what nice. I've gotten a few things done that I've been wanting to get done. I've opened up a few other possibilities that weren't there before and I've started working on a back up plan. Just in case I decide to leave this glorious position.

Big holiday weekend coming up, we'll see what might come from it.

My purse!!... or rent?

So I get home the other night and I find an email in the trusty inbox. By the time I get home there's usually nothing going on. There might be a few other bar people online and half the time they're just checking their myspace or falling asleep. Then I pop open my mail system and I get this message.

This is so f*ckin ridiculous!! I got jumped when I left the bar last night!! They took my $400 phone, $600 worth of make up, my keys, and my $1100 purse!! I'm so pissed off right now!! It's gonna take me forever to get that stuff back so if you want to get a hold of me your gonna have to drive your ass out here or email me.

Wow.. an $1100 purse.. What a waste of money. I could buy a lot of things with $1100. A used car, weights, gym memberships, rent for a few months, just about anything. Anything more important than a purse. I mean, I have pockets but I realize women need purses to carry everything. Do you really need a purse that costs more than the car you drive?

Now I understand, if you can afford it then do it but come on. If you have to drive a crappy car, live in a smaller place or a far off place to afford your lifestyle then is it worth it? Plus, any team of snatchers knows what purses are good or bad. They probably sold that $1100 purse for $200 and were happy. The $600 of make up is probably laying in a gutter somewhere within a couple blocks of where you got jumped. Which is either a lot of make up or, once again, some over priced name brand crap. The phone has probably already been sold for $100 or even $50. Phones are fairly easy to get rid of and reconfigure.

Sorry for the bad luck but try getting your priorities in order. Just because something costs a lot doesn't mean it makes you look that much better. I've seen a t shirt and jeans girl look a hundred times better than a dolled up turnip.

Just glad to know that it didn't happen when you left my bar.

**To the one that sent me the email: If you actually read this, take note how many times I have driven out to see you. Then realize I'm not going to.

Movies getting Snuffed Out...

I'm slowly realizing why I never really read or watched the news before. People and society are becoming complete and total idiots. The nation is becoming way too much of a police state.

I remember growing up to movies that had rude behaviour, slight nudity and funny situations. They were released into the theaters and had maybe a PG-13 rating. Now they want to give a R rating to any movie with a person smoking a cigarette in it. What has happened here?

Granted, I don't think smoking should be promoted to kids but this is taking it a little too far. There's already all of these bleeding heart nut jobs that want smoking banned from public places. Do we really need them in every form of our society? Smoking is a habit, just like drinking, gambling, playing bingo, jogging, walking, writing and many other things. Next will be banning weight machines and gyms because too many people have more muscles than other people. They might hurt you without thinking about it.

Maybe they should raise the stakes for movies based on comic book characters. I mean it is a fantasy land and some kid might jump off the top of a building because they think they can fly. It's just as possible as a kid starting smoking because they saw it on a film.

Then people wonder why we don't have great movies like Animal House or Porkies anymore. If these movies were released now they'd be rated NC-17 due to the nudity. Not to mention the poor quality of horror movies released in theaters.

I guess movies are going the way of music. If you want something good you have to go with the unknowns. Movies released straight to dvd are becoming the new indie trend. They don't even need to be rated.

If the world worried more about current events and less about "protecting" their children from "bad" things it might work out a little better.

Sooner or later your kid is gonna learn what smoking is. They're gonna learn what sex is. They're even gonna learn what alcohol is. And no matter what you do to try and protect them from the evils of the world... they'll probably learn all about it before they make it to 8th grade. And they'll learn it all from their friends and peers.

So which is worse? Smoking in movies or sex in movies?

The stats for underage pregnancies (age 15 to 19) have been declining on a yearly basis but it still costs the government 9 billion dollars a year to maintain. So should sex, holding hands, kissing and hugging be banned from movies too? Maybe.

Then after that we should definitely work on getting alcohol banned from movies. I mean the kids might see someone drink a beer and then drive off. We can't expect them to see this and know it's wrong. We should hide it from them. After all in 2005, 16,885 people in the U.S. died in alcohol-related motor vehicle crashes.

Maybe we should just lock our kids up in the basement and make them read the Bible from front to back until they can quote it word for word. Maybe that would help? Everyone knows that no one kills or murders people because of religion. There's never any problem due to religion.

Here's a great idea. The more a person can take in the faster they learn. Provide your kids with all the information both good and bad on every topic you think you should hide them from. Once they're 18 and no longer your financial burden or responsibility, let them decide what they want to do.

Stay out of my kitchen or I'll piss in your Cheerios.

The Grace of God or Dog??

There is a very small amount of things that annoy me away from work. One of them is when people try to say that something wouldn't have happened without God. Now, I'm not a religious person in many ways. I don't subscribe to a certain thought about what deity represents good or which one represents bad. I know there's a good and bad for every situation and I try to stay on the good side. This being said, I don't necessarily believe in deities or stories handed down for thousands of years.

But here's what gets me. Recently I've started reading a lot of news stories on the internet from a few of the major cities. I'm a dog lover, I grew up with Labrador's, cocker spaniels, and we even had an American Bulldog which is one of the loving-est dogs but he could be angry if someone was doing something they shouldn't be. I don't want to go into the full story of the breed but there is some pitbull in the bloodline somewhere. So when I see another story about a pitbull attacking or someone trying to get the breed banned I read it.

I can understand why people would target pitbulls. They have a slight reputation for being very mean dogs. Then again, I've seen smaller and bigger dogs that can be just as mean. The pitbull just has the jaw power to actually break your bones.

Now, in this news story a 3 year old pitbull ran into a neighbor's yard, through their locked screen door, and clamped onto the face of an 11 year old labrador. The lady that owned the labrador, and her fiance, grabbed a couple wooden tv dinner tables and swatted at the pitbull. When that didn't work the lady grabbed her dog and started pulling on him and shaking him. Then By the Grace of God... the pitbull let go.

After the attack the owner did the right thing. He put the dog down. The dog attacked unprovoked and it could do it again. Next time it could be a child or another dog or anyone. Now the lady is on a mission to make the attack rate drop from 3 attacks to 1 or 2. (Note: The attack rate is currently 3. Which means if a dog violently attacks anything 3 times it's put to sleep.) She's even commented that she will focus on pitbulls if she has to.

Now here's my problem with all of this.

1. The pitbull's owner was an idiot for letting the dog out without it being on a leash or having a muzzle on.


2. The lady and her fiance swatted at the pitbull. In that case, you don't swat, you bash that thing over the head. There might be a life on the line.


3. Some people think they have to try and change the world because their world got rocked a little. I won't disagree with changing the violent attack laws but I'd suggest that the situations are looked at a little closer not the breed. Why jump on the bandwagon and get breed specific? Dogs will act the way they are trained. If it grows up loved, it will be loving. If it's brought up to protect and be angry, then it will protect and be angry.


4. Last thing you really want to do when your dog is clamped down by a bigger more powerful dog? Grab it and start pulling on it and shaking it. Your making the wounds bigger, deeper and worse.


5. God had nothing to do with the other dog letting go. You somehow got the dog to let go. Take credit for your actions.
   

Everyone has their own beliefs. I won't sit here and put them down for the simple reason that everyone needs something to believe in to belong. It's what keeps a lot of people going. So believe what you want to believe until it comes to a society as a whole.

At that point, you should really think about what your trying to do or say because someone will have the exact opposite belief and call you out on it.

Breed specific legislation is something we destroyed for humans a long time ago.

Hook ups...

When you work in the bar industry there's always certain people you take care of. Certain bars hook up certain bars and it works the same with venues and resteraunts. Everyone scratches everyones backs and that's how you get hook ups at other places. I've addressed this before but you can read the other post just to get caught up.

Here's the other post: CLICK HERE

It's basically an unspoken type of thing. You offer up something and you hope that when you visit that person they'll offer something up to you. That's how it works. You don't barter for certain things that just makes you seem needy.

So when I see Stewie over in the corner talking to Laura about a show coming up I opened up my ear.

Stewie - "Yea, you should really come to the show. If you stop by I'll be working the door and I'll let ya in."

Laura - "Really? That'd be pretty cool of ya."

Stewie - "Yea, I know. Then when I'm hungry I'll come over and you just give me what I want for free."

At that point Laura's face kind of went south. Not only did Stewie offer to let her in for free he pretty much demanded something in return. You don't offer things up and then ask for something. That's like giving someone a pencil that you could get from anyone and then asking for $5 for the pencil. Why pay for something that is being given to you?

Stewie should have just offered it up as a nice guy and then waited to see if Laura hooked him up the next time he went there for food. If she does then cool. If she doesn't then she doesn't get the hook up again.

Stewie's kind of new though, he'll learn in time.

Toilet Phone...

"Really? I'm sure as hell not putting my hand in that toilet..."

"But you gotta... it's the only thing I've ever had in my life that I've bought myself."

I'm sure that's how the converstation went with the young girl and her friend. It doesn't really matter how it went really, she got her phone. I've known a couple people who've had to get new phones because they've dropped theirs in a toilet. It's funny and usually a good story to bring up from time to time. Although, I'm not sure I'd reach into a freshly used toilet to get it back. I mean really, it's a Razr phone.. they make them constantly and they're pretty cheap these days. Just quit coming to the bar for a couple days and you got enough money for a new phone.

"Just leave it turned off and put the battery back in after you get up tomorrow. It should be fine."

"But it's not working!!" The tears were running down this girls face as she stood outside of the bar with her friend.

"Dummy... What'd I just say? Don't turn it on."

The girl sat on the sidewalk and cried. You'd think she just lost her wedding ring at her boyfriends house or something. "This is the only thing I've ever bought by myself and no one else bought for me. Hows my mom gonna call me tomorrow?"

I really couldn't believe what I was hearing. A phone is that important? I could see if it was one of those Blackberry phones with the GPS built in and it was the only one of it's kind but this was a cheaply made Razr that was going to probably break on her in a few days anyways.

"I'll die without it!!!"

Hmm.. well.. maybe you should go back in the bar and have another drink.