Interdependent Apprehensions...

Working the front door of a popular bar or club always gives you a bit of local popularity or notoriety. Hopefully more for the first over the second.

The way I look at it the less 'friends' I have the better. Most of the people I meet while working I'll never see other than at work. They'll only really talk and be cool to a doorman, away from his work, if they are regulars or they really want to know you. Out of all the people I've met the regulars are the best.

Then there are the friends of friends. These people are usually pretty cool as well. They're friends of the staff and come in almost as frequently as the regulars. Once they've been in a few times with staff on the staff's days off they get the same perks. Just not as quickly. After all, there is a type of hierarchy going on here.

Then there's Industry. If you work in the industry there are obvious perks when you go to other bars and such. Although, it does matter if the staff goes to your place of work. If I've never heard of it, don't know anyone that works there, or just don't go there then you should get to know somebody. Basically, if you don't scratch our back we don't scratch yours.

This also works the other way around too. If I ever show up at your place I expect the same thing back. If I didn't let you in once then I don't expect you to let me in if I'm in the same state. So all in all someone has to give that break first. If it sounds like a great place to catch a drink or dinner then I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and let you in, as long as you don't have a lot of people with you.

I'll probably ask you what days you work and show up on one your not working. If the foods good or the service is good then I'll show up some time you are working. That's when the game begins. I scratched your back. Now, will you scratch mine?

If your thinking, "This kinda sounds cold," then you've never worked in the serving industry. Servers make very little money hourly. Basically, you survive on your tips and the government gets a cut out of that too. So you get your breaks where ever you can. If you get a good deal from someone you give one back. Scratching backs the whole way through.

Then there's the ladies. There's a popular myth about doormen. I've heard it from many people asking me if it's true. The myth is just that, a myth. Everyone seems to think that because your a doorman you get the pick of the ladies. Definitely not true.

Many times at the door I've been propositioned by females just so they can get into the bar. Granted, as much fun as it sounds it's not really something I'm looking for. I'm not saying that I'll turn down any female that comes around. I'm just saying, why would you offer something like that up just to get into a bar? Offering yourself up like that is a turn off to me.

I can see where the myth comes from. Many times the lady regulars will come up and give me a hug and maybe a peck. Then I let them in the bar before the line. So obviously we must be doing a lot more than just saying hello.

The funny part in that situation is when the other women in line see it. They do one of three things.

Some will walk over, give me a hug and a peck, then reach for the door. Then the line gets a nice little laugh when I thank them for the hug and ask them to wait in line.

Then there are the jokers and talkers. The jokers will laugh about it and joke about it with me without expecting anything, which is fun and sometimes helps them out. The talkers will start heckling me for letting the "whores" in. Depending on the regular, this usually gets them a warning. I basically tell them if they open their mouth again they won't be coming in the bar.

Lastly, there are the women who don't say or do anything. They're just there for some reason and don't really seem to care if they get in or not.

I can say that I fell into the trap before. I tried playing the little game of letting a couple women in a few times just on hopes that something might happen. I played that game and I don't anymore.

Many of my friends and acquaintances have said it before. I'm pretty straight forward about everything. Everything is pretty much the key word there. I've never played the little games that most people play when it comes to "hooking up" or finding a girlfriend. To me, games are a waste of time in that department.

So I have found that it's better not to have a lot of friends. It makes my job easier and I have a lot less things to distract me. Not to say that I don't have opportunities, I just don't go out of my way to find them.